Five Minutes
by Hikari-san42
Summary: Really, why did Tails have to drag him to the movies at midnight to see some dumb chick flick anyway? He was cold, tired, and totally not in the mood. /Borderline crack./


_Five Minutes  
_

_Timeline:_ Sometime after Sonic Unleashed.

_Rating: _T

**Notes:** To be perfectly honest, this whole thing started as an excuse to write Sonic in clothes. However, after the first few paragraphs, I decided to try my hand at one of my favorite tropes: annoyed Sonic. It isn't in his character profile to be short or angry that often, and he never steams, but some of my favorite fics feature him being uncharacteristically irritated with everything. I couldn't resist. This whole thing is in good fun, and it doesn't go anywhere; there's no logical plot. Really, it's just a small domestic moment in the middle of a lifetime of adventures.

**Warnings:** Sonic's really OOC and I love it.

Dedication: To all the people that send me asks and make comments on my stuff on tumblr. You guys have helped me come out of my shell over the past few months and I really appreciate you. More fun awaits us!

Disclaimer: All recognizable material belongs to SEGA.

Forward!

* * *

The winter air was crisp, cold and sharp, slithering up loose jackets on wind that exuberantly blustered to and fro. Shivers wracked jacketed forms, breath puffing in front of faces in small clouds, and teenagers stood close together, huddling against the persistent gust that nipped at noses. Snow had fallen a few days ago, but the jumping temperatures of Station Square had rendered it slush on the ground, pulling grumbles from people as they sloshed through the mud it left behind. The half moon was a weak light source, hanging sleepily in the overcast sky, disappearing and reappearing as the clouds floated by. Street lights were more reliable, drawing small clusters of people to their yellow rings, leaving the sidewalk altogether crowded and desolate at the same time.

"Come _on_, bro!" a young voice broke through the hush of the evening, drawing a few eyes. A small child bundled in a large blue coat that reached his knees and only allowed two twitching tail tips to be seen traced a beeline through the circles of people, dragging a similarly dressed, taller teen behind him. The bigger person was dragging his feet, tan cargo pants hiding red sneakers and green hood pulled over his head and face, obviously reluctant. "We have to get our tickets!"

"Yeah, yeah," the teenager grumbled, baritone voice somehow annoyed and fond at the same time. "We'll make it on time."

"It's almost eleven twenty and the movie starts at midnight! I can't believe you made us _this_ late!"

A sigh and the older person dislodged his arm from the kid's grasp. "Tails, chill. We'll see the stupid movie."

"It's not stupid!"

Green eyes rolled toward the sky and the teen shook his head. "Whatever you say." He leaned down and scooped the kid up, placing him on his shoulders as he sped up to a jog. Easily dodging around stray humans on the sidewalk, the pair made it to the movie theatre in record time, pulling to a stop at the end of the long line.

"Great," the kid sighed as his feet touched the ground. He turned and whacked his companion on the arm, "there's a line. Sonic, I can't believe—"

The newly named Sonic blew a quick breath through his nose and resisted the urge to roll his eyes again. "Tails, it's nearly midnight, I haven't slept in thirty-six hours, please stop abusing me. And, stop worrying – we'll get in."

The kid huffed and turned toward the front of the line, gazing around the person in front of him. Sonic sighed and reached up to rub his temples, wondering just how he had gotten stuck on babysitting duty again. Usually, he managed to con Amy into taking Tails to the movies when one caught the fox's fancy, but she had somehow weaseled her way out of this one. He suspected that the extreme sleep deprivation he was currently suffering from had something to do with her untimely escape, and he cursed Eggman to high hell. The doctor had kept Sonic out for a day and half with one of his minor schemes, and, when he had eventually stumbled his way back into the Workshop, Tails had barreled into him and demanded that he take him to a midnight movie. The resulting argument – during which Sonic may or may not have resulted to whining, with less than superb results – had left Tails the victor and Sonic with a pounding headache that only escalated with each step he took.

The idea of plunging himself into the world of nosy humans in Station Square had left a bad taste in his mouth, so Sonic had opted for a large pair of pants and a large jacket. The cold didn't bother him as much as it should have, but the clothing offered some anonymity, something he craved right now more than anything. He really didn't want to deal with squealing and hero worship at this point in time, thank you very much. Usually, he was neutral about the whole thing, but today, with the world spinning with every step and a nagging, excited, wound up Tails, he just wanted to be left alone.

The clothes were holding that dream to fruition so far, and he had every intention of leaving his hood up until they sat down in their seats and the theatre darkened. Then, he could get two blissful hours of shut eye while Tails ooh'd and ahh'd over his movie.

"Do you think all of these people are here to see it?" Tails had been talking, and Sonic tuned in at the last moment, emerald eyes zeroing in on the scowl working its way across the fox's expression in the face of his lackluster attention.

"It's opening weekend right?" Sonic kicked at a piece of gravel sitting innocently on the sidewalk. Really, Tails should know better than expect him to pay one hundred percent attention at all times. At full capacity, he was usually running at eight-six percent, the rest of his attention span pulled in multiple directions; at his current level of dispassionate apathy, he was pulling a solid fifty-two.

Tails' scowl turned into a momentary glare and Sonic glared right back. Two could play that game, kid. "If we don't get tickets it's your fault."

Sonic puffed out a breath, clouding the air with white condensation. "Yeah yeah. I'll take full blame..." He trailed off, searching for something else to occupy the fox so he could drift back into the recess of inattention and pure daydreaming bliss. "What's this movie about, anyway?"

It was the right question, because Tails perked up considerably. Sonic phased out of the conversation as the kit delved into a rant about the novel this movie had been based on. Sonic wasn't sure, but he was pretty sure that Tails didn't read novels. Something about this whole situation was fishy... He knew Amy read sappy romance novels, putting ideas in her head that haunted him in the form of a huge hammer and a splitting headache, but he thought his little buddy was immune to that sort of nonsense. Tails was a science journal and nonfiction book type of guy. Last he had checked, the fox didn't touch fiction unless someone forced it on him.

"Wait, did you just say vampires?" Sonic tuned back in just in time. Tails glared at him again, planting small fists onto equally tiny hips. "Since when do you read _novels_ about _vampires_?"

"Since Amy left one of her books at the house," Tails answered shortly, shuffling forward as the line moved. Sonic frowned, making a mental note to lob any flowery books at Amy's head the next time he saw her. In fact, if it was her book, why had she friggen dodged taking Tails? Shouldn't she _want _to see a movie adaptation of one of those books? "It was fascinating really – the question of immortality versus the purity of the human soul." Tails soldiered on, unaware of the confused thoughts going through Sonic's head. "There were quite a few religious overtones and, even though the main characters were bland, the philosophy of their predicament was fascinating and –"

"Tails," Sonic said at length, rubbing his temples again. It figured the kid would focus on the _philosophy_ of a _love_ _story_, "did you drag me out here at midnight to watch a _romance_?"

The fox blinked at the unexpected question. Silence stretched between them for a long enough period that Sonic felt his eyebrow twitch. "I guess I did..." Tails looked horrified with himself. "While I was reading it, I was so wrapped up in the immorality and the psychology of the whole thing that I didn't even _notice_—"

"How did you _not notice_ the flowery, sappy, girly love story?!"

Tails turned indignant in the face of Sonic's annoyance. "The _philosophy—_"

"And, another thing – _vampires_, Tails? Vampires aren't real!"

Tails broke off his rebuttal to stare at Sonic critically. His expression morphed into one of disbelief, as if he couldn't decide if Sonic's reasoning was one that he really wanted to follow. Sonic presented him with a glare, affirming that, yes, he was sticking with his mythology bashing, and Tails' mouth stretched into a smile that reminded the hedgehog of poisoned honey.

"This coming from someone who turned into a werewolf every night for about a month."

"Werehog!" Sonic's arm lashed out immediately as his brain gave a knee jerk reaction to that word – _werewolf_. Maybe it was exhaustion talking, but he felt like he had never been more insulted in his life. "I was a _werehog_, and that was completely explainable and logical."

"Oh yeah?" There was challenge in those bright blue eyes and Sonic refused the flinch that worked its way up his spine. "Explain it."

Sonic glared with the power of miniature sun. "You're smart, you figure it out."

Tails smirked in a way that made Sonic feel like he had lost the whole argument and he skittered back a few metaphorical steps. "I can't believe you brought me to see a chick flick," he pronounced sulkily, gathering his tattered dignity like so many gold rings.

"For the last time, the story is more than the romance! You're gonna sleep through the whole thing anyway, so what's the big deal?"

"What if someone figures out who we are? We'll be laughing stock of mobius!"

"You and I both know you don't care about what anybody thinks, Sonic."

"You—!"

"Can I help you...?" Sonic cut himself off as the people in front of them cleared and the open ticket window greeted them cheerily, the gold light inside welcoming movie goers in from the cold. Sonic wanted to smash it.

Sonic dragged Tails to the glass and sent the fox a look that could have melted paint. Tails wisely kept his mouth shut. "What do you got that has explosions?" The theatre employee was staring at him, expression surprised. "Hey," Sonic rapped on the glass with his knuckle, pulling the unfortunate man out of his ogling. "Explosions? You know – boom, kablam, lots of orange and fire?"

"Oh, um... There's _Sonar_, which is about a mer—"

"No mythology please." Sonic knew he would regret his rude tone in the morning, but, for now, it was nice to take his frustrations out of someone who couldn't fight back. Really, he shouldn't be feeling this angry since he had just recently blown up a few of Eggman's badniks, but Tails had the uncanny ability to get under his skin.

"Ah... Well, there's _Green Hill_, which is a sort of origin story—"

"Origin story means superhero! Tails, we're in luck! Maybe this trip wasn't a waste of time after all! Two please, one child and one adult!"

Tails coughed lowly. "Um... I'm not sure if you want to see _that_ particular movie... It's sorta about y—"

"Excuse me, but do you have ID?" The teller was squinting at Sonic through the glass. "_Green Hill_ is rated PG-13 and I need to verify that you're old enough to see it."

Chaos, how he hated humans and their arbitrary regulations. He leaned forward a bit, expression a blank canvas. "Do I _sound_ like a thirteen year old?"

"Ah, no..." The man tugged nervously at his collar. "But, it's company policy and—"

Sonic was fed up with everything. First Eggman had nearly taken his head off with some stupid robot, then Tails had dragged him out into the cold to watch a dumb romance movie, and now this ticket dude was giving him sass. He had half a mind to spin around and stomp all the way back to the Mystic Ruins, but Tails was staring at him with those puppy dog eyes and he had wasted like an hour making the trip to the movie theatre and then waiting in line so he was gonna see a freakin' movie damnit.

"No, I don't have ID," he said carefully. Tails sent him a wide eyed plea, obviously anticipating his next move.

"Then I'm afraid I can't let you in—"

Sonic sighed loudly, more for effect than anything else, and yanked his hood back, allowing his bright cobalt quills to spring up to their full length. The man behind the glass choked, drowning out the sound of Tails' facepalm, and the hedgehog's grin only widened as the teller quickly turned to his register and tapped out a few commands on the screen.

Really, being a hero could have both its up and downsides, and being recognized on sight qualified for both. Usually it was gratifying, especially when people went out of their way to thank him, but it could also be annoying when he wanted to go somewhere undetected. Sometimes, however, it was useful, such as this very moment, when he was quite possibly on the verge of a rampage and all he wanted was to watch a movie proliferated with mind-numbing action and explosions and would you please just let him buy some tickets _thank you._

"H-here you go, Mister Sonic the Hedgehog, sir." Really, the sir was a little much, but Sonic didn't comment as he accepted the tickets through the little slot under the glass.

"How much?" Sonic fished in his pocket and came back with some spare bills he had stuffed there as he had rushed out of the Workshop earlier.

"On the house." The employee was glancing backwards, as if expecting someone to jump out and tell him he was being punk'd.

Sonic felt a surge of his usual modesty come back and he pushed the tickets back under the window. "I can't accept these without paying."

"And I can't make you pay to see a movie after you just saved that village from Dr. Eggman this morning!"

"Sonic," a careful voice came from somewhere near the vicinity of the hedgehog's shoulder and he glanced down. He had forgotten that Tails was there, "how about we take the tickets and buy some popcorn? The theatre will still get the money, right?"

The man blinked and focused on Tails, choking again as he realized that the small golden face belonged to another of the planet's heroes. Distantly, Sonic hoped that all this exposure wouldn't leave the guy blindsided for too long. Sonic sighed, but lost the will to argue as his headache suddenly roared back to life. "All right, fine." The man pushed the tickets back and Sonic accepted them, gazing down with hooded green eyes. "Thanks man."

"You're welcome! And thank you for... you know... everything."

Sonic nodded and reached back for his hood, ignoring the curious stares that followed them all the way through the front doors. They passed the ticket agent with little fuss and Tails stopped in front of the concession stand with a hand held out in front of him. "I'll get the popcorn, you get the seats."

Sonic contemplated the merits of allowing a child to purchase snacks in a crowded place at midnight alone, but his headache demanded that he sit down now please and he decided that Tails could handle himself. Silently, he handed over some of the money still wadded up in his pocket and turned, tossing a lazy wave over his shoulder.

He scaled the stairs and sat somewhere near the middle of the theatre, avoiding the eyes of any of the people already the seated. For the time, the theatre was surprisingly crowded, the low murmur of conversation soothing on his fried nerves, and he settled in the plush seat, closing his eyes and releasing a deep breath.

It didn't take Tails long to appear, balancing a large bucket of popcorn and a two drinks. His hood was down, large ears swiveling to and fro, and his eyes caught the light as he looked for his friend from the foot of the stairs. Sonic waved at him, sure that the kit's night vision would easily see him, and Tails smiled and started up the stairs.

He dropped the popcorn into Sonic's lap and plopped down, holding the drinks level. Wordlessly, Sonic traded the popcorn for his drink and Tails set his in the cup holder, eyes staring blankly at the screen. They sat in silence for a few seconds before Sonic sighed.

"Look, Tails, I'm not mad at you."

"I know." The fox's voice was low and even, and he leaned forward to take a sip of his drink. "I honestly didn't realize it was a romance though."

Sonic smiled for the first time that night and reached over to ruffle the fur between his friend's ears. "You know, for someone so smart, you sure can be an airhead sometimes."

Tails rolled his eyes and turned to address Sonic directly, but a loud voice from behind them cut him off.

"Hey, you! Kid! That's a great Tails cosplay!"

Tails stiffened, ears flattening, and Sonic swiveled in his seat, peering over the back of the chair. There was an overly enthusiastic young human waving at them, yelling for Tails attention. The people sitting around them were either shooting the boy annoyed looks or peering at Tails curiously, and Sonic felt his eyebrow twitch.

"Hey kid! Are you mobian?! Where'd you get that costume?!" The human teen stood while he was speaking and began making his way down the aisle, scooting around disgruntled movie goers already in the row.

Sonic yanked Tails' hood back onto his head and stood in one move. "Hey, you!" he parroted, pinning the human with a glare and a pointed finger. The boy paused on the stairs. "Mind your own damn business and sit back down!"

"Just tell us where—"

Sonic growled and pulled his hood off for the second time that night, earning a few startled gasps from the people watching the small altercation. "Dude, that's Sonic," he heard someone murmur in the row below his and Tails groaned and sank in his seat, covering his face with his hands.

"You— You're—" The teen on the stairs was staring at him, eyes wide and jaw working mechanically as he stuttered. "So, that means..." His eyes traveled over to Tails, who was turning a peculiar shade of red.

"Sit _down_," Sonic ground out, head pounding and temper shortening with every second, "and let your fellow movie goers enjoy the quiet, would you? Some of us want to get some _sleep_—" Tails choked, but Sonic ignored him. "—and all your chaos forsaken noise is making that impossible."

"But, I just want Tails' autograph—"

Sonic pulled his hood back up. "Leave him alone." He spun back around and dropped into his seat, mumbling under his breath about nosy humans.

Tails sighed next to him, stood up, and brushed past him, moving faster than Sonic's exhausted brain could comprehend. By the time he realized what had happened, his best friend was already bounding up the stairs two a time. He stopped in front of the annoying teenager and spoke to him softly, waving his hands toward the hedgehog's slumped form. Sonic could practically hear the fox apologizing for his behavior, explaining that he had just gotten back from a big battle and was very tired. _Please excuse his behavior,_ Tails probably added, grinning in a placating way, _we just want to watch a movie in peace. I'd be glad to sign an autograph though._

He returned a few minutes later and rolled his eyes at Sonic. The hedgehog couldn't gather the will to care about his rudeness, but he was disappointed that he had upset Tails. Contrary to his behavior, he really did enjoy these small outings with his friend. Life offered them very few normal moments like this, and he cherished every one; he was simply too tired to show it.

"Tails..." He tried anyway, despite his exasperation. "I'm sor—"

"Save it." The fox held up a hand. "I know how you get when you're tired. It's fine. I handled it."

Sonic sighed and reached for a handful of popcorn. Tails offered him the bucket. "No more midnight movies."

"Agreed."

The theatre darkened a few minutes later and Sonic settled deeper into his seat, preparing himself for a well-deserved nap. First, however, he wanted to see which superhero this movie was about. The humans had an impressive array of them.

The previews were blessedly few and the movie started with little fuss. On a black screen, the words _based on a true story _flashed briefly, confusing Sonic, but he shrugged it off. The opening shot was an aerial view of Green Hill Zone in the summer, the sea a beautiful sparkling blue and the beaches unblemished and free of tourists. Sonic snorted to himself, wondering just how many people they had to chase away to get the footage they needed. The camera plunged into the forest, skating past the large stone loops he remembered fondly from his childhood and a few obviously CGI crabmeats. The robots shook their pincers menacingly at the camera as it passed and the crowd gasped accordingly. Sonic rolled his eyes.

Suddenly, a bright cobalt flash slammed into the badniks, cracking them into small pieces. Unconsciously, Sonic's hands fisted themselves around the armrests. The camera whipped after the blur, pulling even with it despite the breakneck speeds it moved at, and it consolidated into the form of a blue hedgehog. Distantly, Sonic recognized the famous mobian actor behind the cobalt dye and green contacts, but that thought fled as the hedgehog on the screen grinned and shot the camera a thumbs up. "Not to worry! Sonic the Hedgehog is here!"

Sonic felt the armrests crack under his fingers.

The wannabe Sonic sped up and blasted ahead of the camera, snaking through the trees. The view panned backwards, widening as the title phased onto the screen.

_Green Hill: Sonic the Hedgehog's Origins_

Ah, yes. An origin story – he had been right. If only he wasn't completely dense.

Where was it you grew up again, Sonic?

The hedgehog pushed himself forward, determined to get out of here as fast as possible. Tails, who had been watching Sonic's dramatic reactions with a touch of amusement, put his hands out to stop him.

"No no, Sonic!" he whispered, schooling his features to hide his smirk. "That guy let us in free! We have to stay for the movie!"

The kid didn't hide his grin quickly enough. "You _knew_," the hedgehog hissed, horrified. "I'm so outta here."

"No, you can't!" Tails latched onto his arm as Sonic stood, dragging him back down. "C'mon, just sleep! It'd be rude to leave after everything—"

Sonic glared at him, half wishing to set the fox on fire with his eyes. "Whatever," the fight left him just as soon as it appeared and he slumped back into his seat. He glared balefully at the screen.

The blue hedgehog who happened to be using his name plowed through fake robots like a hot knife through butter, cracking pun filled one liners as he went. Sonic felt his eye twitch and he crossed his arms.

"I don't talk like that."

"Sure you don't," Tails shoveled popcorn into his mouth, "and I can't fly."

"Watch it, fox."

The kid hummed back at him, gasping along with the crowd as a missile flew out of nowhere and nearly took the hedgehog out. Sonic scoffed and pulled his hood further over his head, finally closing his eyes and giving his aching brain what it craved.

Approximately two hours later, he felt someone shake him awake.

"Mister Sonic, sir." Sonic's ear twitched, fluttering against the nearness of the sound, and one of his large green eyes cracked open. The ticket agent from before was bent over him with a broom clutched in his hands.

"Huh?" Sonic articulated eloquently, glancing around. There was pressure on his right side and a look there revealed Tails, fast asleep against his shoulder, the arm rest pushed up behind him.

"The movie's over," the theatre employee informed him, glancing over Sonic's head. "Everyone's already cleared out."

"Huh," Sonic repeated, this time in the affirmative. "Well..." He jostled his shoulder, knocking it lightly against Tails' golden head. "Hey, Tails, bro, wake up." The fox groaned but pushed himself upright, the white tufts of fur on his face squashed and shapeless. "Movie's over."

"Huh?" Tails blinked, mirroring Sonic. "When—? Ah man, I fell asleep!"

The hedgehog grinned at him. "You did better than me. I lasted, maybe, five minutes."

"Right when it was getting good too. Eggman had you tied to a table and he was getting ready to dissect you to figure out what made you so fast."

Sonic's smile disappeared. "That never happened."

"It so did! It was based on a true story! What do you know?"

The nap had put Sonic in a considerably better mood, but that didn't mean he was willing to put up with Tails' teasing. "Okay, wise guy, let's get outta here and get home. I could sleep for two years." He rose, pulling Tails up with him, and turned to the employee still standing nearby. "Hey man, thanks again, for the tickets." He rubbed the back of his neck. "Sorry we didn't watch the whole thing."

The human grinned at his apology. "Don't worry about it. I could tell you were pretty wiped, so I kinda guessed you were gonna sleep."

"Well," Sonic put his hand out and the human quickly grasped it, giving it a firm shake, "we'll probably be seeing you. Knowing this kid, he'll want to see a movie again in a few weeks." He ignored Tails' annoyed sound and winked. "It gets him out of the workshop, so I won't complain."

The man looked shocked at the idea of seeing them again. "Y-yeah, I'll— I'll see you around, Mister Hedgehog."

"Just Sonic's fine. You're older than me!"

"Okay, yeah. Sonic."

The hedgehog nodded and turned, tossing a wave over his shoulder with one hand and guiding Tails forward with the other. They started down the stairs, Tails' piping voice rambling about the movie.

"Hey, Sonic, is it true that you once stopped Eggman from stealing all the coconuts in Green Hill Zone?"

"Tails..." Sonic's tone held warning, which the fox promptly ignored.

"Wait, how did you get out of the dissection? No, wait! Don't tell me – spoilers!"

Sonic sighed and resisted the urge to gag himself with the strings on his hoodie. "Shut up, kid."

"There was a scene where you dove into a lake to get a Chaos Emerald. Why didn't you tell me that you used to know how to swim?"

Sonic groaned and vowed to never travel to a movie theatre without researching what was playing ever again.

"And you had a girlfriend! When did you break up?"

Especially with Tails.

* * *

_Reviews are cherished. _


End file.
